on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
