i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
