He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Sext me about skeletons
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
