That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
