and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
