It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize