Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
