He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize