sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
hotel room ftw
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
