Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
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