and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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