She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
i think i just lost a toe
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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