Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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