they need to just BURY HIM!
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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