But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
