I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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