my vag is so smooth its legendary
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
