your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
