so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
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