I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
