Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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