I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
