Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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