i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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