It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
we should paint friendship bongs
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