Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job