Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
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