That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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