margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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