For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
