did you get engaged???
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
This couple is walking their pig around campus
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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