I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
