I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize