last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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