let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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