I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize