i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
