we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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