You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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