it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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