you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
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