So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
