I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
