there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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