I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
