I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
pray to the hookup gods
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
