what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
