we're chasing vodka with high fives
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
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just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
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Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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