Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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