I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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